Step 1

"What's love got to do, got to with it? What's love but a secondhand emotion? Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?" I wish I could sing this song and believe in what it says. But that'll never happen. I am a 'LoveFool' 100%.

Moving on, I'm at work. I leave at 4:30. I can't wait to get the hell out of here. Being in this office makes me think I'm cut off from the rest of the world. It's as though time stops when I'm here. Minutes feel like hours and the day crawls by. When I go out for a smoke I see people across the field walking around campus and I feel like a prisoner stuck at this little school watching freedom pass me by. To make things worse I have a headache right now. Me and my damn headaches. I have the medicine Dr. Treviño prescribed to me but I haven't taken it yet, I'm lazy like that. It's really hot right now. I don't know what the hell I was thinking when I came in this morning and changed the temperature. I mean I know I get cold but seriously... I made it too hot. I'm surprised no one has complained to me yet. Once again, I feel too lazy to get up and readjust it. All I want to do is go to sleep. Just put my head down and sleep until someone wakes me up and tells me that all my worries and concerns are gone and I can start living again. That would be so nice.

But of course that's not going to happen. We all know that in order for things to get better I have to stop messing around and make an effort to make things better. Right now, I don't feel like it. Give me a few more days, or months, maybe even a year...

Ok I can't believe I just wrote all that. My life is fine, I am fine. But you see what work does to me?! I start to think less than happy thoughts and get all moody and dramatic. I'm stopping right now.

Let's see... After I get out of work I'm going to go home, take a nap, plan out my classes for next semester, straighten my hair, go to the movies and/or go to Crystal's, go home, wait for a particular phone call (I wonder if I'll get it or not), and go to sleep.

That's the way things SHOULD happen tonight. We'll see.